batmanschmatman | 076 [voice]

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076 [voice]

Is it that time of year again already?

You know, talk about needing better warden communication or food or security as much as you want, I'd honestly settle for a more consistent way to contact home and never complain about anything going on here again.

... Maybe.

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Since you and Kirk are all BFF teenage girls now what with your little slumber parties, I...figured you might know what's got his panties in a bunch.

You could always, you know. Ask him yourself. [Since he is not actually a teenage girl and doesn't gossip about people like this.]

Yeah, I could, and he wouldn't tell me.

Come on. Kirk tossed me into Zero after you snitched on me about the fact I gave you a workout all over Paris. You owe me.

Yeah, and you owe him for being here for you for this long. I know it's easy to write us off as incompetent, morally superior jerks who just don't get what it's like to really be stuck here, but some of us do care about the people we get stuck with, and you're not giving him enough credit.

[Oh hi sudden lecture.]

I'm not -

What did he say about me exactly?

[What was that about not gossiping about people Dick hm hm hm]

[This is also him drawing on personal experience with stubborn inmates who like to not cut you any slack/consider you a flawed but ultimately well meaning human being. :V]

Ask him.

Again, he'd just pout at me and not say anything useful, then eventually pretend he's over it and keep that bitterness saved up for a rainy day.

[She knows this because they're soulmates and it's what she'd do. :V]

Look, if I'm the reason he's crying himself to sleep at night then could you at least ballpark what it is I've done recently that he finds so offensive? Because he and I have slightly different metrics for that.

Shego, just ask. You're the one sounding like a teenager right now.

Oh, whatever. By the way, it's fascinating that you guys are apparently okay gossiping about me, but when I'm actually trying to do something constructive I can't even get a hint of what he said.

We weren't gossiping. And I seriously think you just need to talk to him yourself. If you want my advice or opinion on it, that's what I'm suggesting.

...

He's not here 'for me' anymore. He's here because he'll die if he goes home.

Did he tell you that?

That he's now officially well on the way to getting his crazy death wish? Yeah, he told me that.

That's not what I was asking. Did he tell you he's just here because of that?

Why, did he tell you something different?

I think you're totally jumping to conclusions, assuming the worst and fishing for information from me because it's easier than putting yourself out there and risking getting hurt. Talk to him.

You're wrong. Later.

[SIGH.] If you say so.

'If you say - '

Oh, and you wonder where the 'morally superior jerk' thing comes from? You don't know me.

You don't know me, either.

Yeah, and you can tell from how I'm not making grossly misguided assumptions about your motivations.

Uh-huh. [You are assuming he's going to sing like a canary about stuff he was told in confidence, so. :V]

[She isn't assuming that but figured it was worth a shot. :c]

Whatever. Happy birthday.

[Going off now to hit things and not talk to Kirk out of spite. YET.]

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076 [voice]

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