batmanschmatman | 015 [audio]

[Filtered away from Roman, but otherwise Public.]

Okay, so, a flood turned hostile takeover attempt, another sinister plot, a port... now do you think we'll get a little bit of downtime?

I know people had their issues with port, but seriously, at least for the most part, barring a misadventure here or there, most of us got out pretty unscathed. That's got to be worth something on the scale of boring to traumatic.

... And it was kind of fun, being a cop again. Even if there wasn't exactly much chasing down bad guys involved.

I mean, not that I'm saying "sign me up for a universe transfer", but I guess all I'm trying to say is I'll take what I can get.

[Private to Port Family: Olivia, Wally, Seven, Tim, Shego, Isaac]

Seriously, as far as fake families went, you guys were pretty cool.

[Private to Tim]

Were you ever going to get around to telling me my best friend survived the Crisis?

[Private to Ariadne]

Did you and Jensen get to say your tearful good byes, or are you now parted from your one true love forever?

And hey, I think this port's the first time we've ever gotten to hang out that hasn't been interrupted by the Barge trying to collapse around us or something. Clearly a celebration is in order.

[Private to Bourne]

So... How's your shoulder?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

There's a rather large part of me which would quite like a universe transfer form.

Well, I'd be lying if I didn't say it was a blast working under you for a while. You make a good police captain.

I'm glad you think so. And, to be fair, you were more competent than most of the people who usually work under me.

Oh, and seriously, thanks for showing me what to do with a gun.

Well thanks, Sarge. You ever need a competent officer, you know who to call.

And seriously, it wasn't a problem. Glad I could help.

First on my list, no worries.

Well, even so, thanks for not making fun of me or anything. I know some people might have.

That's ridiculous. It's not your the UK's got different rules about their officers handling firearms.

I'd almost say you're better off. Some cops don't have any more right to be holding a weapon than known violent criminals do.

Well, I know, but I suppose officers who're quite used to having them might not understand that.

I'd say we are better off. Less people are likely to get shot by accident when I'm policing, and it's the basic principle - we're not policing on the threat and fear of potentially lethal violence, we're policing on respect.

And we're also trained how to face someone who is armed when we're not - and I've done it on several occasions. It's... a curious kind of thing to be trained in, if you think about it.

[And this is one of those LOL IF YOU ONLY KNEW moments, but instead of sounding amused or anything, Dick manages to sound totally innocent.] How so?

I don't know. I imagine that most people would expect you to face a gun with equal or more firepower - and sometimes, that's what's needed, and you get armed back up for a reason. But knowing how to take someone out with a gun when you're unarmed puts you at a decent advantage to someone who's quite reliant on having a gun on them.

I imagine.

Oh, definitely. Most people who rely on guns to get stuff done tend not to be particularly good with hand to hand combat. It's the ones who don't use guns you should be really afraid of, at least, back where I'm from.

I'd like to think you've got less reason to be afraid of me, as I've at least got as much experience in calming and talking a situation down as non-armed combat.

It usually works.

Don't worry Howie, I don't think you're gonna jump me in the hallway and stuff my body in a closet or something.

I could have very, very dark secrets.

I think I could take you. [He's teasing. But. You know.]

That better not be a challenge. As I wouldn't take bets either way. [He's teasing. But faintly sure you're right.]

So, how would you rank this port compared to the others you've been to?

Rank is a difficult term. Because, as far as traumatic experiences - quite lowly. In terms of emotional ones, and the aftermath of that - quite highly.

In terms of how much I enjoyed it - a lot, and in terms of how much it bothers me now - again, a lot.

Guess it did hit a little too close to home for a lot of people.

Aye. And normally you can distance yourself from a flood, a port, I guess. For some people, there was very little distance this time.

All things considered? I think I got off lucky. I'd probably have been a little more shaken up if it'd been my real family.

Aye, I think so. Someone might have had to drag me back if it was mine.

Do you always have to come back on the Barge? Like, has anyone ever stayed behind?

I am fairly sure you can't. I've never heard of it happening, but this doesn't stop my inmate trying to escape. I wouldn't want to take any chances.

Probably a good idea. Enough people disappear as is without having the option to just jump ship every time we pull into port.

Exactly, and the most recent disappearance... Abigail came back to the boat with me, then disappeared.

So I'm not sure what to make of that.

private

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