batmanschmatman | 001 [video] introduction

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001 [video] introduction

So, I guess I should probably get around to introducing myself or something. I'm Dick, and I'm a new warden around here. Seems like an... interesting place so far.

... Sooooo, does anyone know when I'm actually supposed to get assigned an inmate to keep an eye on?

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[Tim is out of his room in a half second and there is zero preamble before hugs. Because it's Dick. And Dick is here. And Tim might have missed him. :c]

[D'awww, Dick will definitely be hugging you back. Even though he doesn't have the whole 'I haven't seen you in a long time' thing going for him, he's glad he's here, because seriously, it's Tim and Tim is pretty much the coolest little brother ever.]

[He is TOTALLY COOLER THAN DAMIAN, RIGHT? RIGHT? :| But Tim'll step back and just clap him on the shoulder or something lame like that.] So you got the run down, right?

[UM OFC is that even a question?]

Yep. Sounds like I've got a real fun who knows how long ahead of me.

[Turns out Tim deals with being fired as badly as Dick did. :c]

Yeah. Real fun. [Paaaause] There are a few people on board who know about us. Martha Jones, Cissie, obviously Wilson and Nygma. And a girl named Hayley. And my inmate. Sylar. [And he's rubbing the back of his neck.] Speaking of, he'll probably ask you all sorts of things, once he realizes who you are.

[It's clearly a nonbiological Batgenes thing.]

I've talked with Cissie, actually. How do these people just... know?

And, uh, should I be concerned with this questioning or...?

It's. It's complicated. Cissie was Arrowette; we worked together in Young Justice. Uh, don't spring that on her before I get the chance to tell her you know. Sylar I told. Long story. ...And yeah, you should probably be concerned. It's usually to get more info about me.

So basically, keep all the embarrassing Timmy stories to myself.

Yeah, basically. -- Wait, what embarrassing stories?

...And, uh. Be wary of anything he might say.

I've got a few.

You know, this whole 'giving me advice about what to do' would work a lot better if you were less cryptic.

It's just complicated with him, Dick. He's a killer, he's messed up, and I trust him, but at the same time, I don't trust him at all. [He thinks Sylar'll take everything he's said and try to turn Dick against him. :c] Just - be careful of him. He's already gotten to Cissie and Steph.

[Mister paranoia is here.]

Tim, don't worry about it. Eternal optimism aside, I've kind of learned my lesson about blindly trusting people. Seriously this time. [AKA Tarantula, wth was that.]

And besides, I've got a bit of Bat paranoia going on too. ~~Just apparently not as bad as you.~~

[They will just never talk about that ever, right. Tim nods. Shhh it's not his fault he's turning into Bruce. (Well maybe it is.)] All right, okay. Good.

[Aaaand he's rubbingthe back of his neck because this is the worst part.] There's, uh. One other, kind of important part about the Barge. Might not have come up.

Andddd that would be...?

That in some other universe our entire lives are fictionalized and recorded in comic books and...really, really awful movies. That's, uh. That's how Hayley and Martha figured it out.

That's... interesting.

[Which really means wtf since when.]

[Dick you are getting a LOOK.] Way to downplay it.

It's downplay it or watch my brain explode. Take your pick.

...Yeah, okay. [He freaked out mightily. :c] It hasn't come up much since I found out, at least. [And he's just. Going to snort.] There are these terrible movies, though - I mean, you'll want to laugh and be offended all at once.

... Okay, now I'm getting a little weirded out. How bad are we talking?

[Tim is just going to shake his head and cover his face to hide another snort.] Bad. It's campy and terrible and mostly wrong. I think you might have to watch this. [Because he needs to share the pain.]

If I suffer some kind of mental breakdown because of this, I'm blaming you. Just so we're clear.

I'll probably join you if I have to watch it a third time. [Because Batman & Robin causes all kinds of mental stress. For everyone.]

How'd you get your hands on them?

The library.

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action; DYING OF CUTE

action; IT IS SO ADORABLE :C

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action; Fourth walling him okay, or no?

action; fine with me!

action; \o/

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