batmanschmatman | 029 [audio]

[There's a short pause between the feed clicking on and Dick speaking.]

My parents were murdered when I was eight. I was there when it happened. It was... [He takes a slow breath.] It felt like my whole life was just falling apart and I had no idea what was going to happen or where I was supposed to go or how I was supposed to live without the two most important people in my life.

But I got lucky, because someone was there that night who knew what it was like to have their parents taken away from them. He took me in, gave me a home and support and made life feel like it was worth living again. I know I got lucky. A lot of kids... A lot of kids lose parents and just end up going through foster home after foster home, and if Bruce hadn't been there, that's probably what would have happened to me. I would have been alone and lost, with no idea what I was supposed to do with my life.

Instead, I got a family. They've helped me become the person I am today and I can't thank them enough for it. I've had an amazing life, even if it's not always sunshine and rainbows, and I love my family more then anything.

... I'll always miss my parents. That hurt never goes away, and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't think about them and wish I could talk to them just one more time, but I...

[...]

I wouldn't trade what I have now for the world.

[... Oh crap. Didn't mean to say any of that out loud, to everyone. Fuck you, floods. :|]

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[ She glances up at him for that. ]

What was yours?

Bludhaven.

Really? You'll never be forgiven? I doubt that.

Even if everyone else on the planet forgave me for what happened, I'll never forgive myself.

That's no fair. I said I thought my decision was a good one.

I thought mine was too.

I still stand by my decision to go to Africa. It sucked, but it was the right thing to do at the time.

Anyone would want a break after what happened.

[ She's just quiet. Because it wasn't about needing a break. She wants him to believe that it was, but she doesn't want to lie to him. ]

[Dick just holds her a little tighter, leaning his head against hers a little.]

[ She can't help it. She pulls a little away from him. ]

We're all liars.

[He lets her, looking at her with some confusion and worry in his expression.]

Well, yeah, but... What do you mean?

One shining moment of perfect honesty. I can't live up to that.

Flood induced honesty.

Is it bad that I'm jealous?

I don't know. I don't really know how I feel about actually... saying that out loud, you know?

At least... it's nothing to be ashamed of. There's that, right?

I guess.

[He's just worried about what Bruce will say. :|]

Edited 2011-03-13 19:30 (UTC)

I guess that's what I'm jealous of.

[ Time to lounge across your lap. If you thought you were moving in the next half hour or so, you were totally wrong. ]

Why? You think if you'd been compelled to spill stuff to the Barge, it would have been bad?

I don't really have anything good to share that doesn't stem from something horrible.

You mean like saying you miss your dead parents, but you sort of selfishly like the life you have now?

[There is definitely some guilt in there.]

Edited 2011-03-13 19:44 (UTC)

You're happy. Your parents would be happy that you're happy.

You know, because your parents loved you?

Yeah.

...I do miss them.

You're lucky. You had it good, while it lasted.

spam;

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