029 [audio]

[batmanschmatman]

[There's a short pause between the feed clicking on and Dick speaking.]

My parents were murdered when I was eight. I was there when it happened. It was... [He takes a slow breath.] It felt like my whole life was just falling apart and I had no idea what was going to happen or where I was supposed to go or how I was supposed to live without the two most important people in my life.

But I got lucky, because someone was there that night who knew what it was like to have their parents taken away from them. He took me in, gave me a home and support and made life feel like it was worth living again. I know I got lucky. A lot of kids... A lot of kids lose parents and just end up going through foster home after foster home, and if Bruce hadn't been there, that's probably what would have happened to me. I would have been alone and lost, with no idea what I was supposed to do with my life.

Instead, I got a family. They've helped me become the person I am today and I can't thank them enough for it. I've had an amazing life, even if it's not always sunshine and rainbows, and I love my family more then anything.

... I'll always miss my parents. That hurt never goes away, and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't think about them and wish I could talk to them just one more time, but I...

[...]

I wouldn't trade what I have now for the world.

[... Oh crap. Didn't mean to say any of that out loud, to everyone. Fuck you, floods. :|]

Comments

text

[ichoosefight.livejournal.com]

[ Because now she's crying a little and she can't really deal with this. ]

Do you need a hug? I think it's hug time.

text

[batmanschmatman]

[Good, because while he's not crying, he's... definitely something, oh god why did I post that to the network D:]

... Yeah, a hug might be good.

1/IDEFK IS THIS REAL LIFE none of this is recorded

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ So he's just surfing the network, going through the posts and hey Dick- hey- what- ]

2/IDEFK

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ His first thought is 'what about your secret identity' and 'you should've known better' and 'take more precaution damnit' but that's the Bat, that's not Bruce, because Bruce is- ]

3/IDEFK

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ Bruce doesn't know how to react, Dick. He has never tried to replace your parents, and to hear that-

Maybe I haven't failed him, a small voice is saying. Maybe I did the right thing, taking him in.

And he wants- god he wants-

He wants to believe. ]

4/this is like neverending

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ He can't talk. He should but he can't and- ]



[ He can't write either. How does he react properly to this? He doesn't want to fail again. He never wants to make them feel that he doesn't-

love them-

He can't even write it. The pen shakes in his hand- his hand is trembling. Even when tortured he doesn't tremble like this. ]

You

5/lalala

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ How does he react how does he react his mind won't stop running but he has no answers.

He can't deal with this. He doesn't know how to deal with this. He has contingency plans for the most absurd and dangerous of situations but he doesn't know what to do when his son tells him he loves him.

You saved me, he wants to say. You came to my life and dragged me out of the darkness that wanted to swallow me whole. You kept it away just by being you.

He has the words. He doesn't have the voice. ]

6/7 he needs to just talk already

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ He picks up the pen again. Looks at the journal.

He has to try. Because he doesn't want- because when he died after months of seeing his failures repeat over and over-

He died thinking that everyone he loves don't know how much they mean to him. And he's here- and everything he sees prove his last dying thought right.

He has to try. ]

7/7 private; text

[fivestepsahead.livejournal.com]

[ His handwriting is shaky. A little smudged. ]

[peektuttut]

[...Oh Christ, he cannot handle this.]

Too bad there are no safeguards against floods, huh? [Awkwarddddddd awkward. :c]

[batmanschmatman]

[BRB, HEADDESKING FOREVER.]

Yeah, that's putting it mildly.

[feverprophecy.livejournal.com]

you know, I'd say something like "I think I just threw up in my mouth a little"

but it'd be a lie. I'm touched on your behalf. how inspiring.

encore?

[batmanschmatman]

Knew I could count on you being supportive, Jay.

a long while later because bonding is happening (unless you don't want threadjacking)

[ichoosefight.livejournal.com]

Are you Jason Todd?

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

This wouldn't happen to be the same reportedly charitable Bruce that's appeared on the barge recently?

[Eddie told Crane about Bruce Wayne being a good (as in nice) dude in their universe, so Crane's making a guess.]

[batmanschmatman]

Yeah.

[fireandlies.livejournal.com]

How touching.

[Can you hear the heavy sarcasm? There is heavy sarcasm.]

[batmanschmatman]

Why thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Right back at you. Only. This is more obnoxious, good natured sarcasm.]

;private

[lostundercover]

You okay, guy?

;private

[batmanschmatman]

Yeah, I'm okay. Kinda embarrassed and pissed with the Admiral, but... hey.

[Private]

[truth_is_cold]

[He makes it private, because he doesn't want Harper jumping in with tons of anger.] To a Nietzchean... the Nietzcheans as they were when I knew them, a family is everything. At it's core, it's about genetic continuity, but... more importantly, it's about a connection wishing to carry on something greater into the future.

It appears, genetic link or none, that you have managed to succeed in this. Well done. [Not that he knows them very well, but he does know something about considering someone he's not genetically related to family.]

[Private]

[batmanschmatman]

[Dick doesn't really know what to say, because suddenly having personal stuff all over the network for people to comment on is definitely weird, but he does appreciate what he's saying.]

... Thanks.

[handwritten text]

[young-idealist.livejournal.com]

I didn't quite realized you were orphaned. My sympathies.

[handwritten text]

[batmanschmatman]

[Ffff Dick never knows what to say to this sort of thing.]

Thanks.

private - and late. nanomited howie only just realised regular howie would say something.

[kingfor-aday.livejournal.com]

...I'm sorry about your parents.

But I'm glad you've got something you can appreciate. I don't think enough people appreciate what they've got.

private - awww howie

[batmanschmatman]

That does seem to be a pretty common part of the human condition or something.